What they tell you about "unfriendly" divorces?

 When my husband, Bill, and I got a divorce, I was so hurt that I wanted to blot out all traces and connections with his family.  And I got my way!  The trouble was that it robbed me of years of conversations with my brothers-in law, their wives at the time, their children and all familial ties.   Gradually, the kids all came back to me on Facebook and I became a minor part of their lives.  And that was better than nothing!  So Robin, Sherri and Christy became mine again!

Today Sherri wrote that today is her dad, Chuck's birthday!   How I loved Chuck and Lynn, Bill's brother...and I still silently do.  I wish I had been mature enough to keep up with them.  O yes, I justified that it would be better this way!  Better for who!  Divorce does not just hurt the principals involved; and their children;  it hurts all the connections that have made you family!   We were married 30 years --the same was true of Bill...who missed 30 years of suffering through deaths, births, congratulations,all the things that come with family.   It is not important, in the end, what made the decision happen;  it happened.  But the calamitous results still affected many, many people in a negative way

Happy birthday, Chuck!